Vanessa (left) and JoAnna Garcia Swisher.Photo:NetflixThings are heating up for the couples onThe Ultimatum: Queer Love— and if you ask hostJoAnna Garcia Swisher, all’s fair in love and war!In the new episodes, which dropped on Wednesday, the cast came back together after their respective trial marriage periods. While at the group dinner, they discussed their time away from their original partners and what they each learned during their trial marriage.Things became particularly intense for Vanessa, 30, who found herself facing criticism from a number of the cast members for her actions before and during the trial marriage. In particular, Lexi, 25, blasted Vanessa, arguing that she was there for the wrong reasons, especially after Vanessa got intimate with Lexi’s ex, Rae, 27, during their trial marriage.After Vanessa issued an apology to the group, Yoly, 34 — who was partnered with Vanessa’s ex, Xander, for the trial marriages — called her attempt to mend the situation “performative” and later accused Vanessa of making everything “about herself.“Vanessa and Rae on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.NetflixDespite the tense situation, Garcia Swisher exclusively tells PEOPLE that the confrontation between Vanessa and the other cast members seemed “important” to her.“Whether it be a defense mechanism or whatever, there was a lot of people that were very vulnerable and there was high intensity,” she continues. “Sometimes jokes fall flat and things are said that are insensitive or not okay. And everybody was willing to point that out. But she was also there to kind of course-correct, I think, which I appreciated. I love a growth moment.“At times, when the situation escalated, Garcia Swisher admits to wondering if she was doing enough as host.“Sometimes I walked away and I thought, ‘Oh gosh, did the producers think that I wasn’t doing my job enough?’ Because I really let it eat,” she explains. “I was like, ‘Go for it.’ Because a lot of things needed to be aired out. A lot of things did need to be talked about … I wanted people to feel heard and I wanted to give people that opportunity.“She continues, “I mean, obviously it’s my job to reign it in and kind of keep the ship going in the right direction, but there’s a lot of emotions at stake. You’re talking about people’s lives, people’s hearts, people’s relationships, long-term relationships, their future. I really wanted to give everybody a chance to say their peace. And I was super invested, especially after the [first] trial marriages, when everybody came back for the trial marriage [with their original partners]. I was filled in a little bit about what happened and my heart was just like, I felt that nervous energy of just waiting for the other shoe to drop.“JoAnna Garcia Swisher on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.courtesy netflixThough tensions ran high, Xander, 30, found herself coming to the defense of Vanessa at the dinner, especially after her ex’s apology.“Do you want to hear apologies from Vanessa? No, like, duh, doesn’t make sense. But leave that little piece of openness in your heart, everyone, to allow for there to be growth here, in general. That’s what we’re all here for,” she told the group.However, Xander now tells PEOPLE her defense of Vanessa was simply rooted in her personal character and their longstanding history as a couple.“I actually don’t like the word defend because I don’t feel like that I defended her in a way, even though I do feel like that it looked like that from everyone else’s point of view,” she explains. “I think that [my perspective] really came across as I don’t like anyone to be bullied or for anyone to be outnumbered in a way.““During our meet-up nights where we are talking a lot about Vanessa, I’m like, ‘She’s not even here. Why are we talking about her? This is exactly what she wants actually. So can we just move on with the things that work, like our lives and things like that?'” she continues. “Looking back, I do wish that I would have stepped back a little bit more and let her handle her situation because she’s an adult and she can do that.““But I will also say she’s someone that I was with for four years. I’ve known her for eight to 10 years,” Xander adds, calling Vanessa her “stability and my point of affection and love” prior to the trial marriage shakeup. “That’s where I got a lot of that [response] from.““So hearing that she is being attacked or talked down to and things like that, I think it’s my second nature to go after and try and help someone out with that,” she concludes of the situation.Vanessa and Xander on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.NetflixBesides Vanessa and Xander, the other original couples consisted of Lexi, who issued an ultimatum to Rae; Mildred, 33, who issued an ultimatum toTiff, 32; Yoly, who issued an ultimatum to Mal, 36; and Sam, 31, who issued an ultimatum to Aussie, 42.While one partner felt ready for marriage, the other didn’t. So the ultimatum will help the couples decide if they want to say “I do” or call it quits. But first, they had to go through a trial marriage with someone from another coupling.The trial marriage partnerships ultimately consisted of Lexi and Mal, Mildred and Aussie, Xander and Yoly, Vanessa and Rae, and Tiff and Sam. Some developed physical connections, while others remained strictly emotional or friendly.Xander and Vanessa.courtesy netflixAfter episode 6’s dinner, the couples reunited with their original partners to step into another trial marriage with each other. They only have a few weeks together before they must decide the fate of their relationship and if they want to get engaged or split for good.As many of the pairs have found, their time together has been far from smooth, arguing over the first trial marriage and everything that transpired — for better or worse. Fans won’t find out who ends up together until the next batch of episodes drops next Wednesday.Never miss a story — sign up forPEOPLE’s free daily newsletterto stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.The first eight episodes ofThe Ultimatum: Queer Loveare now streaming on Netflix.
Vanessa (left) and JoAnna Garcia Swisher.Photo:Netflix
Netflix
Things are heating up for the couples onThe Ultimatum: Queer Love— and if you ask hostJoAnna Garcia Swisher, all’s fair in love and war!In the new episodes, which dropped on Wednesday, the cast came back together after their respective trial marriage periods. While at the group dinner, they discussed their time away from their original partners and what they each learned during their trial marriage.Things became particularly intense for Vanessa, 30, who found herself facing criticism from a number of the cast members for her actions before and during the trial marriage. In particular, Lexi, 25, blasted Vanessa, arguing that she was there for the wrong reasons, especially after Vanessa got intimate with Lexi’s ex, Rae, 27, during their trial marriage.After Vanessa issued an apology to the group, Yoly, 34 — who was partnered with Vanessa’s ex, Xander, for the trial marriages — called her attempt to mend the situation “performative” and later accused Vanessa of making everything “about herself.“Vanessa and Rae on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.NetflixDespite the tense situation, Garcia Swisher exclusively tells PEOPLE that the confrontation between Vanessa and the other cast members seemed “important” to her.“Whether it be a defense mechanism or whatever, there was a lot of people that were very vulnerable and there was high intensity,” she continues. “Sometimes jokes fall flat and things are said that are insensitive or not okay. And everybody was willing to point that out. But she was also there to kind of course-correct, I think, which I appreciated. I love a growth moment.“At times, when the situation escalated, Garcia Swisher admits to wondering if she was doing enough as host.“Sometimes I walked away and I thought, ‘Oh gosh, did the producers think that I wasn’t doing my job enough?’ Because I really let it eat,” she explains. “I was like, ‘Go for it.’ Because a lot of things needed to be aired out. A lot of things did need to be talked about … I wanted people to feel heard and I wanted to give people that opportunity.“She continues, “I mean, obviously it’s my job to reign it in and kind of keep the ship going in the right direction, but there’s a lot of emotions at stake. You’re talking about people’s lives, people’s hearts, people’s relationships, long-term relationships, their future. I really wanted to give everybody a chance to say their peace. And I was super invested, especially after the [first] trial marriages, when everybody came back for the trial marriage [with their original partners]. I was filled in a little bit about what happened and my heart was just like, I felt that nervous energy of just waiting for the other shoe to drop.“JoAnna Garcia Swisher on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.courtesy netflixThough tensions ran high, Xander, 30, found herself coming to the defense of Vanessa at the dinner, especially after her ex’s apology.“Do you want to hear apologies from Vanessa? No, like, duh, doesn’t make sense. But leave that little piece of openness in your heart, everyone, to allow for there to be growth here, in general. That’s what we’re all here for,” she told the group.However, Xander now tells PEOPLE her defense of Vanessa was simply rooted in her personal character and their longstanding history as a couple.“I actually don’t like the word defend because I don’t feel like that I defended her in a way, even though I do feel like that it looked like that from everyone else’s point of view,” she explains. “I think that [my perspective] really came across as I don’t like anyone to be bullied or for anyone to be outnumbered in a way.““During our meet-up nights where we are talking a lot about Vanessa, I’m like, ‘She’s not even here. Why are we talking about her? This is exactly what she wants actually. So can we just move on with the things that work, like our lives and things like that?'” she continues. “Looking back, I do wish that I would have stepped back a little bit more and let her handle her situation because she’s an adult and she can do that.““But I will also say she’s someone that I was with for four years. I’ve known her for eight to 10 years,” Xander adds, calling Vanessa her “stability and my point of affection and love” prior to the trial marriage shakeup. “That’s where I got a lot of that [response] from.““So hearing that she is being attacked or talked down to and things like that, I think it’s my second nature to go after and try and help someone out with that,” she concludes of the situation.Vanessa and Xander on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.NetflixBesides Vanessa and Xander, the other original couples consisted of Lexi, who issued an ultimatum to Rae; Mildred, 33, who issued an ultimatum toTiff, 32; Yoly, who issued an ultimatum to Mal, 36; and Sam, 31, who issued an ultimatum to Aussie, 42.While one partner felt ready for marriage, the other didn’t. So the ultimatum will help the couples decide if they want to say “I do” or call it quits. But first, they had to go through a trial marriage with someone from another coupling.The trial marriage partnerships ultimately consisted of Lexi and Mal, Mildred and Aussie, Xander and Yoly, Vanessa and Rae, and Tiff and Sam. Some developed physical connections, while others remained strictly emotional or friendly.Xander and Vanessa.courtesy netflixAfter episode 6’s dinner, the couples reunited with their original partners to step into another trial marriage with each other. They only have a few weeks together before they must decide the fate of their relationship and if they want to get engaged or split for good.As many of the pairs have found, their time together has been far from smooth, arguing over the first trial marriage and everything that transpired — for better or worse. Fans won’t find out who ends up together until the next batch of episodes drops next Wednesday.Never miss a story — sign up forPEOPLE’s free daily newsletterto stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.The first eight episodes ofThe Ultimatum: Queer Loveare now streaming on Netflix.
Things are heating up for the couples onThe Ultimatum: Queer Love— and if you ask hostJoAnna Garcia Swisher, all’s fair in love and war!
In the new episodes, which dropped on Wednesday, the cast came back together after their respective trial marriage periods. While at the group dinner, they discussed their time away from their original partners and what they each learned during their trial marriage.
Things became particularly intense for Vanessa, 30, who found herself facing criticism from a number of the cast members for her actions before and during the trial marriage. In particular, Lexi, 25, blasted Vanessa, arguing that she was there for the wrong reasons, especially after Vanessa got intimate with Lexi’s ex, Rae, 27, during their trial marriage.
After Vanessa issued an apology to the group, Yoly, 34 — who was partnered with Vanessa’s ex, Xander, for the trial marriages — called her attempt to mend the situation “performative” and later accused Vanessa of making everything “about herself.”
Vanessa and Rae on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.Netflix
Despite the tense situation, Garcia Swisher exclusively tells PEOPLE that the confrontation between Vanessa and the other cast members seemed “important” to her.
“Whether it be a defense mechanism or whatever, there was a lot of people that were very vulnerable and there was high intensity,” she continues. “Sometimes jokes fall flat and things are said that are insensitive or not okay. And everybody was willing to point that out. But she was also there to kind of course-correct, I think, which I appreciated. I love a growth moment.”
At times, when the situation escalated, Garcia Swisher admits to wondering if she was doing enough as host.
“Sometimes I walked away and I thought, ‘Oh gosh, did the producers think that I wasn’t doing my job enough?’ Because I really let it eat,” she explains. “I was like, ‘Go for it.’ Because a lot of things needed to be aired out. A lot of things did need to be talked about … I wanted people to feel heard and I wanted to give people that opportunity.”
She continues, “I mean, obviously it’s my job to reign it in and kind of keep the ship going in the right direction, but there’s a lot of emotions at stake. You’re talking about people’s lives, people’s hearts, people’s relationships, long-term relationships, their future. I really wanted to give everybody a chance to say their peace. And I was super invested, especially after the [first] trial marriages, when everybody came back for the trial marriage [with their original partners]. I was filled in a little bit about what happened and my heart was just like, I felt that nervous energy of just waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
JoAnna Garcia Swisher on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.courtesy netflix
courtesy netflix
Though tensions ran high, Xander, 30, found herself coming to the defense of Vanessa at the dinner, especially after her ex’s apology.
“Do you want to hear apologies from Vanessa? No, like, duh, doesn’t make sense. But leave that little piece of openness in your heart, everyone, to allow for there to be growth here, in general. That’s what we’re all here for,” she told the group.
However, Xander now tells PEOPLE her defense of Vanessa was simply rooted in her personal character and their longstanding history as a couple.
“I actually don’t like the word defend because I don’t feel like that I defended her in a way, even though I do feel like that it looked like that from everyone else’s point of view,” she explains. “I think that [my perspective] really came across as I don’t like anyone to be bullied or for anyone to be outnumbered in a way.”
“During our meet-up nights where we are talking a lot about Vanessa, I’m like, ‘She’s not even here. Why are we talking about her? This is exactly what she wants actually. So can we just move on with the things that work, like our lives and things like that?'” she continues. “Looking back, I do wish that I would have stepped back a little bit more and let her handle her situation because she’s an adult and she can do that.”
“But I will also say she’s someone that I was with for four years. I’ve known her for eight to 10 years,” Xander adds, calling Vanessa her “stability and my point of affection and love” prior to the trial marriage shakeup. “That’s where I got a lot of that [response] from.”
“So hearing that she is being attacked or talked down to and things like that, I think it’s my second nature to go after and try and help someone out with that,” she concludes of the situation.
Vanessa and Xander on The Ultimatum: Queer Love.Netflix
Besides Vanessa and Xander, the other original couples consisted of Lexi, who issued an ultimatum to Rae; Mildred, 33, who issued an ultimatum toTiff, 32; Yoly, who issued an ultimatum to Mal, 36; and Sam, 31, who issued an ultimatum to Aussie, 42.
While one partner felt ready for marriage, the other didn’t. So the ultimatum will help the couples decide if they want to say “I do” or call it quits. But first, they had to go through a trial marriage with someone from another coupling.
The trial marriage partnerships ultimately consisted of Lexi and Mal, Mildred and Aussie, Xander and Yoly, Vanessa and Rae, and Tiff and Sam. Some developed physical connections, while others remained strictly emotional or friendly.
Xander and Vanessa.courtesy netflix
After episode 6’s dinner, the couples reunited with their original partners to step into another trial marriage with each other. They only have a few weeks together before they must decide the fate of their relationship and if they want to get engaged or split for good.
As many of the pairs have found, their time together has been far from smooth, arguing over the first trial marriage and everything that transpired — for better or worse. Fans won’t find out who ends up together until the next batch of episodes drops next Wednesday.
Never miss a story — sign up forPEOPLE’s free daily newsletterto stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from juicy celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.
The first eight episodes ofThe Ultimatum: Queer Loveare now streaming on Netflix.
source: people.com
